Although we may have the best intentions in building a strong relationship with our spouse, it’s easy to fall into a few traps that will undermine our relationship rather than build our relationship.
Mistake #1 – Criticizing Your Spouse
It’s easy to criticize your spouse for not being perfect while we ignore our own imperfections. We need to focus on what we can do and give to our relationship rather than on whether or not our spouse has imperfections or idiosyncrasies that bother us.
After all, there is a good chance that you knew about those imperfections long before you married them. Yet, you made a decision that in the grand scheme of things they really didn’t matter. Well, you were right, they really don’t matter and you need to get over it!
Instead of wasting your energy dwelling on their faults, use your energy to create a balance in your life between family, friends, work, sports, hobbies, recreation, and other interests.
When you work on your own life, you are less likely to hyper focus on the imperfections of your spouse.
Mistake #2 – Making Fun of Your Spouse
A common mistake made by many in their marriage relationship is to use their spouse as the source of humorous material for their conversations with others.
They may say that it’s just in jest, and their spouse is secure in their relationship and knows they are kidding; however, anytime we are willing to say things to make light of our spouse, we are treading on sacred ground and better take a step back.
Cutting remarks, even in jest, cut nonetheless and why would anyone want to cut someone who is the focal point of their existence?
Mistake #3 – Assuming Your Work Is Done Now That You Have Caught And Married The Person Of Your Dreams
It’s easy to be lulled into a belief that the real work of a marriage relationship is done once the “I Do’s” are said.
However, it is really just the beginning of discovering and nurturing a relationship that will last a life time. Keeping love alive in a marriage requires work and communication. That means that you should talk daily about things of interest, of importance to your family and your marriage.
It’s also a good idea to have a weekly date night that is free from the distractions of family and work to help your marriage grow in depth and magnitude.
As you side step these common mistakes in your marriage, you will discover an intensification in your marriage that you had never imagined possible when you first started down the road with your spouse.
Beth Young is the Senior Editor of the leading marriage advise web site,
MarriageAdvise.com. To download your free ebook titled, “101 Marriage Secrets”